Shannon's Story
12/9/2009 - Shannon's At It with the Snow
Wed, Dec 09 2009 by Shannon
How fitting it is that Shannon would send snow today on the 2nd anniversary of her passing. Memories are flooding back today of times we spent playing in the snow. Ever since she was little she LOVED the snow.
For so long I have been sad, hurt, frustrated, and angry. I couldn't pull myself out of the wanting, missing her and needing her with me. I was losing joy in life... in loving all those around me that are here with me.
Shannon stopped visting me in my dreams for awhile this year. And she just recently started to visit with me again just two days before the anniversary of her becoming our wonderful Snow Angel. And it has made me realize that Shannon would not want me to wallow in hurt, anger, self-doubt, and frustration. That is not who she was. She was LIFE. She was LOVE. She was the warm glow that everyone would feel when she came into a room. She was my little pumpkin.
It made me realize I wasn't alone in my missing her, needing her. I wasn't alone in my hurt, anger, self-doubt and frustration. I have finally gotten to a point now that I can accept the fact that she is not in the same physical world as I am. But she is truly still here. She is in our memories, in our hearts and our prayers. She watches over all of us. She gives us that little nudge that we may need to get beyond a point in our lives where we may feel we can't do it. That life is too hard or too unfair.
I have wallowed in self-pity long enough. I have been angry and hurt at her husband long enough. I can accept that because she loved him so much and beyond reason that he would need to feel that kind of love again so quickly after she was gone. I forgive him and accept now that he has found someone to share his love with someone new. It is not that he has replaced Shannon in his heart with someone else. It is that he has found room in his heart for another next to Shannon. Forgive me for being so short sighted.
For her friend that is still feeling anger, please, please, please, find it in your heart to forgive and move on. Embrace again the friendship that was yours for so many years and that the love you all shared with Shannon be your inspiration to reach out to each other again and enjoy the future. Shannon would be so very disappointed that the common thread that had brought you all together is torn. But she would know that it can be repaired. It just takes a little forgiveness on both sides.
Take this sign that Shannon sends us each year... the gift of SNOW to go embrace your passion for snowmobiling and bring back the slednecks to be a team again.
Do this in memory of Shannon. Do this in memory of all the good times you shared. Do this for the good times that are sure to come for many years to come... snowmobiling.
Thank Shannon for watching out for all of us... and sending the snow to remind us she is with us still.
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